the many moods of larrydigital, pt. 12

To download podcast from the iTunes Store: Click here.

Well, whaddya know! Another lousy Christmas has snuck up on us so it's time for another lousy podcast. It's kinda nice to have a second Christmas episode. It means that I've been able to sustain.... whatever it is I'm doing here for a whole year. Actually, a little longer than a year, since the first podcast debuted in November 2007. I have to admit that I surprised myself, I expected to lose interest in this a long time ago. But lo, here I am. I still enjoy it, much more so these days since I think I've figured out some stuff production-wise.

I just hope that people enjoy listening to it. Although, it's hard to tell if people are enjoying the podcast due to the complete lack of recent reviews on my iTunes page! *hint*

A quick note about this episode, I've decided to replay a song from last year's podcast. The last track, Ella Fitzgerald's "Santa Claus Got Stuck in My Chimney," for reasons that are explained in the episode. I hate to be mysterious but I have to entice listeners some how. And the podcast itself sure isn't gonna do it!

Episode 12: Santa Claus Wants Some Lovin'

1. larry's intro
2. "We Wanna See Santa Do The Mambo" by Big John Greer
3. "Boogie Woogie Santa Claus" by Lionel Hampton & His Orchestra
4. "Five Pound Box of Money" by Pearl Bailey
5. larry's interlude #1
6. "Christmas Night In Harlem" by Louis Armstrong
7. "Poncho Claus" by El Vez
8. larry's interlude #2
9. "Shake Hands With Santa Claus" by Louis Prima
10. "Blue Xmas (To Whom It May Concern)" by Miles Davis
11. larry's interlude #3
12. "I Saw Daddy Kissing Santa Claus" by RuPaul
13. "Christmas Kisses" by Ray Anthony & The Bookends
14. "Christmas Dinner" by Tennessee Ernie Ford
15. "larry's interlude #4
16. "We Wish You A Merry Christmas" by Jacob Miller & Ray I
17. "A Party for Santa Claus" by Lord Nelson
18. "Santa Claus Is Ska-ing To Town" by The Granville Williams Orchestra
19. larry's interlude #5
20. "God Rest Ye Merry Gentlemen (Oh No Remix)" by Jimmy Smith
21. "Getting Down for X-Mas" by Milly & Silly
22. larry's interlude #6
23. "Santa Claus Wants Some Lovin'" by Albert King
24. "Soulful Christmas" by James Brown
25. larry's interlude #7
26. "Santa's Rap Party" by Super-Jay
27. "What I Want for Christmas" by The Quad City DJ's, The 69 Boyz & K-Nock
28. larry's interlude #8/Outro
29. "Santa Claus Got Stuck In My Chimney" by Ella Fitzgerald

This month's theme song is "Holiday On Skis" by Al Caiola & Riz Ortolani.


the many moods of larrydigital, pt. 11

To download podcast from the iTunes Store: Click here.

Hey there, boys and ghouls, guess who's back?

Just in time for All Hallows Eve, the latest episode of the many moods of larrydigital is a super-sized frightening fiesta! This month's podcast features includes horrifying holiday hits from Bobby "Boris" Pickett, Don Hinson & The Rigamorticians, The Nightmares, Tyrone A'Saurus & His Cro-Magnons and many, many more.

Listen... if you dare!

Episode 11: Larry's Halloween Spooktacular Tracklist

1. larry's intro
2. "Monster Mash" by Bobby "Boris" Pickett & The Crypt-Kickers
3. "Drac's Back" by Billy DeMarcus
4. "Frankenstein Stomp" by Count Lorry & The Biters
5. larry's interlude #1
6. "Surfer Smash" by Bobby "Boris" Jones
7. "Riboflavin-Flavored, Non-Carbonated, Polyunsatured Blood" by Don Hinson & The Rigamorticians
8. "Rockin' Zombie" by The Crewnecks
9. larry's interlude #2
10. "Happy Halloween" by John Zacherley
11. "Dead" by The Poets
12. "Headless Ghost" by The Nightmares
13. larry's interlude #3
14. "I Want My Baby Back" by Jimmy Cross
15. "She's Fallen In Love With A Monsterman" by Screaming Lord Sutch
16. "One, Two, Three" by The Groovie Goolies
17. larry's interlude #4
18. "The Monster Twist" by Tyrone A'Saurus & His Cro-Magnons
19. "The Raven" by Buddy Morrow & His Orchestra
20. larry's interlude #5
21. "Halloween Spooks" by Lambert, Hendricks & Ross
22. "Cha-Cha With The Zombies" by The Upperclassmen
23. "Zombie Jamboree" by King Flash & The Calypso Carnival
24. larry's interlude #6
25. "Werewolf Bar Mitzvah" by Tracy Morgan
26. "Soul Dracula" by Hot Blood
27. larry's interlude #7/outro
28. "Haunted House of Rock" by Whodini

This month's theme song is "Spooky Scherzo" by Sam Fonteyn.


the many moods of larrydigital, pt. 10

To download podcast from iTunes: Click here.

Man, I really hate blogs.

While I think it's great that just anyone can now have a relatively anonymous outlet for their random thoughts, it doesn't necessarily mean that those thoughts deserve an outlet. For example, the blog maintained by a friend of a friend recently spent six paragraphs bemoaning people who use the word orientated instead of oriented. The entry following that is a minute by minute breakdown of the MTV Video Music Awards. After reading through most of these entries, I couldn't help thinking..... Who gives a crap?

Because of this blogs, and many, many others like it, I think that by and large, blogs are unnecessary. And just so we're clear, this blog is no different. It's just as unnecessary. I'm positive that absolutely no one cares about my musings about pro basketball.


While I agree that this blog is boring as anyone else's, I like to think that what separates it from other blogs is that this one was originally conceived as a music blog that would primarily promote my podcast, the many moods of larrydigital (also available from the iTunes store!). This blog has a purpose, the Hot Mexican Love Comics blog has a purpose, the upcoming Oliver J. Pugsworth Academy of Design blog has a purpose (details coming soon). That makes them different right? ........Not really. They're all equally useless. So you can still expect entries on subjects that mean absolutely nothing to anyone. Yay!

Anyway, you may have noticed a slight stylistic change in this site. Namely, the new graphic at the top of the page. If you look closely, you'll notice that it contains the names of various bands and artists, many of which are favorites of mine. All of which have either been included in my podcast already or will be included in a future episode.

Wow. I really took the long way around to comment on my lame new banner, didn't I?

On to the podcast, this episode is sort of a mini-tribute to Isaac Hayes. The first part being my choice of background music, "Hung Up On My Baby" from his soundtrack to the 1974 blaxploitation film Tough Guys. This song was famously sampled by the Geto Boys for their 1991 breakthrough hit "Mind Playin' Tricks On Me." Here's a quick larrydigital fun fact: the CD single for "Mind Playin' Tricks On Me" was the first CD I ever owned. The second? Color Me Badd.

The second part of the mini-tribute is the inclusion of Isaac's nine minute song "Hyperbolicsyllabicsequedalymistic" from 1969's Hot Buttered Soul. This is the second song from Hot Buttered Soul that I played in the many moods of larrydigital. Considering there was only four songs on that album, playing two of them seems kind of funny to me.

Episode 10: Business Hours Are Over Tracklist

1. larry's intro
2. "Needy Girl" by Chromeo
3. "SuperWhat?" by Lyle Workman & Bootsy Collins
4. "Call Me Up" by Rick James
5. larry's interlude #1
6. "Hot (I Need to be Loved, Loved, Loved, Loved)" by James Brown
7. "The M.G. Beat" by The Mighty Generation
8. "Crossword Puzzle" by Sly Stone
9. larry's interlude #2
10. "Business Time" by Flight of the Conchords
11. "We Rule the World (T.H.E.H.I.V.E.S.)" by The Hives
12. "Cellphone's Dead" by Beck
13. larry's interlude #3
14. "El Micrófono" by Mexican Institute of Sound
15. "Hey U" by Basemen Jaxx
16. "Bamboo Banga" by M.I.A.
17. larry's interlude #4/outro
18. "Hyperbolicsyllabicsequedalymistic" by Isaac Hayes

This month's theme song is "Hung Up On My Baby" by Isaac Hayes.


Isaac Hayes R.I.P.

I'm not going to go too in depth about how Isaac Hayes was one of my favorite singers or anything (even though he was) because there's already dozens of epitaphs out there already and I'm sure that most of them are much better than anything I could write.

I'll just simply say that I was deeply saddened to hear that he had died.

I think it's a shame that he's more famous today as being the voice of Chef from South Park rather than the guy who co-wrote Sam & Dave's "Soul Man." Or as the guy who released the phenomenal Hot Buttered Soul album in 1969. Or as the first African American to receive an Oscar for non-acting work (Best Original Song in 1971 for "Theme From Shaft"). But it's a better legacy than most I guess. It's fitting I suppose considering that Isaac last #1 single was his song "Chocolate Salty Balls," which he recorded as Chef for the Chef Aid soundtrack from South Park in 1995.

Why can I say? The world just got a little less funky, people.


San Diego Comic Con Wrap Up

Ahh, July.

Each year, not only does it supply us with horrible stories of illegal fireworks and mutilated teenagers, it also brings with it the San Diego Comic Convention. Which is great because that means it's time to get off my ass and start hustling the last issue of Hot Mexican Love Comics.

We've had a new book each summer for the last 3 years so usually I head down to San Diego for the whole weekend in order to pimp the book to its fullest but this year, with the addition of Jazzy Jake to the Hot Mexican Love family, I knew that I wouldn't be able to go for the entire weekend. Picking my spot, I figured that I'd be able to be the most help on Saturday since that's usually the busiest day. I wanted to get there bright and early as soon as the doors open on Saturday so I left my place around 9:30pm on Friday night.

It's usually a two hour drive from the San Fernando Valley to San Diego so I wasn't too worried about the trip. I had a recently renewed Sirius radio contract, a fully stocked iPod, a bottle of Dr. Pepper and a large packet of Skittles (mmmm, sugar rush) so I was good to go. Traffic's light around that time so I was making good time until I hit Long Beach where the 405 turned in a single lane due to unforeseen "police activity" (thanks KNX 1070!) It only pushed me a hour back turning my two hour drive into a three hour drive which normally wouldn't be a huge deal but I popped the Skittles early into my trip so by the time I hit downtown San Diego, I was crashing fast. It's now 1:30am, I'm tired, cranky and in need of sleep. Or a beer.

I got the hotel info from Bean Robot the day before I left but I forgot the exact address. No worries, I'm a resourceful guy, I'll use my navigation system. Brilliant! .....or not. The hotel we were staying at was recently purchased by another local chain so at that particular time, there were two hotels with the same name. Not paying attention to this, I park my car five blocks from where I'm told the hotel was. I sling my bags over my shoulder, grab the awkwardly-sized box of comics I brought with me and start walking. I get to the properly named hotel and call Bean Robot who informs me that I went to the wrong location. The correct hotel, one with the same name mind you, was literally across the street from where I parked. I was just too tired to notice.

Once everything's straightened out I quickly realized that I'm now even more tired, even more cranky and even more in need of sleep. Bean Robot suggests we go to the hotel bar, which sounds like a fantastic idea to me. But by the hotel mess got figured out, it was now well past 2:00am. In other words, it's off to bed.

The next morning, we seemed to get off to an slow start. Four of us were working the six foot table which meant that we were a little cramped. This was Angry Bob's first full convention with us and I've got to say, he did a great job. He worked the West Hollywood Book Fair with us last September but the San Diego Comic Con is an entirely different animal. It's the biggest comic convention in the country and over the last few years, it's grown to encompass far more than just comics and it's packed with so many people. The aisles are just packed with people so the convention is a pain in the ass just to attend, to work it is even worse.

Truth be told, every single year I dread the convention. Because like I said, it's a pain in the ass. We're usually stuck there at our table, pushing the comic and we rarely get the opportunity to actually see the rest of the convention of meet up with friends who we know are at the convention as well. But this year, Angry Bob changed all that. Having a fourth person there really freed us up to work in rotations, something we never really had the chance to do. I think all of us got the opportunity to stretched our legs and walk around for a bit. Which was really cool.

The show itself was cool. Like I mentioned, it started out slow to us but after a while we realized that it only seemed that way. Before we knew it, we were on pace to sell more issues than we'd ever had before. But none of seemed difficult. We were all so.... relaxed. Man, the difference an extra body makes. And that is the power of Angry Bob.

We met some really interesting people too. I got interviewed by a Spanish language newspaper from San Diego that wanted to talk to me about racism in comics. I tried to rope Bean Robot into the conversation but I think he exited stage left as soon as he realized that it was semi-serious. I don't blame him, I was planning to do the exact same thing to him. I'm interested to see how the article came out but I'm not exactly holding my breath. Last year, we got interviewed by four different outlets, including NPR, and none of those ever surfaced. To my knowledge, at least.

As always, my favorite feature of the convention are the costumes. Every year, a large number of convention goers show up dressed as their favorite comics/film/animated character, sometimes with fantastic results, other times they go horribly awry. In either case, I figure one reason these people dress up is a little shameless self-promotion so if they're going to whore themselves out anyway, why not get them to promote our book at the same time? It's a win-win!

Here are a few of my favorite pics this year....

Angry Bob with a personal convention favorite, the authentically Mexican star of Futurama, Bender B. Rodriguez.

The White Queen didn't need her psychic powers to see what was on Bean Robot's mind. His thoughts were written all over his pants.

Playboy.com's Melany Denyse. Click here to see a shot on Playboy.com of the hard-working HMLC crew with Ms. Denyse. Warning: Don't click that link while at work, kids!

Face it, tiger, you just hit the jackpot! (The first person who writes in to say that Mary Jane Watson actually said that, not the Black Cat, is a NERD.)

Our latest celebrity endorsement! Diedrich Bader, formerly of The Drew Carey Show, and the voice of Batman in the upcoming Batman: The Brave and the Bold animated series shows off his HMLC fanhood.

This guy asked if we wanted his wings on or off for the photo. Oh, definitely on.

The Teen Titans' Hawk & Dove were very excited to find our booth. Very excited. Especially Dove there on the left.

And while we're on the subject of thinly veiled phallic symbols.... here's Plastic Man.

Chewbacca? More like COOLbacca.

Order your copy of HMLC early enough and you can even get it in a galaxy far, far away.

Cobra Commander and the first woman I ever truly loved (dude, seriously, The Baroness was hot) are shocked by the depravity of the latest issue.

Hellloooooooo Kitty

These little ladies were at the con promoting the cosplay café, Royal/T in Culver City. According to their flyer, Royal/T is Los Angeles' first meido kissa restaurant which basically means that the service staff there dress as, and I quote, "elegant maids." I'm told that the café primarily caters to otaku, aka obsessive anime fans. Sounds positively pedo-rific to me.

Oh, hey. What's up, Michelangelo?

I think this Rorschach costume looks better than one I saw in the Watchmen trailer.

Wonder Woman and Awesome-X. Booosh!

All in all, it was a great show. I haven't heard the final numbers from Señor Ira yet but the early word is that this was our most successful year yet. The aforementioned shot glasses (a convention exclusive!) were a tremendous success. Truth be told, I wasn't 100% on board as far as the shot glasses were concerned. I wasn't completely convinced that they were a product worthy of the HMLC brand name and I was pretty vocal about it within the HMLC nucleus. Luckily for me that Bean Robot and Señor Ira recognize that I usually have no idea what I'm talking about.

While I'm at it, I want to give a very special thanks to Señor Ira. He's usually the taskmaster that has to put everything together, from cracking the whip on the creators, to getting the hotel rooms, to dealing with the tax collecting section of the City's Office of Finance. Playing the bad guy is a thankless job but without Ira, Hot Mexican Love Comics never would've emerged from it's 10 year hiatus. It may seem like some of us need a break from each other by the time an issue is published but we've all had a tremendous amount of fun because of the book and it's due to Ira. So gracias, Señor.

So what's next for Hot Mexican Love Comics? Nothing. For now. Contrary to previous reports, I think we're going to skip this year's West Hollywood Book Fair in September and concentrate on our appearance at the Alternative Press Expo in San Francisco in November. I do believe we'll have something new for the APE show, possibly a brand new sketchbook.

Stay tuned for updates, true believers!


God's In His Heaven....

....And all's right with the world.

It was announced yesterday that the Lakers have signed Sasha Vujacic to a three year deal worth $15 million. The word is that he was courted by a number of European teams but opted to stay in Los Angeles. What a surprise!

And lo, the mancrushes rejoiced.


Comic Con Update

Here is the updated info for our appearance at this year's San Diego Comic Con....

We'll be in the Small Press area, Table N8. The convention starts on Thursday and runs through Sunday. I believe that Señor Ira and Angry Bob will be manning the table, or as Señor Ira says "manhandling the table," starting Thursday with Bean Robot showing up Friday, and the Lady Janice and I arriving Saturday. In order words, if you want to fully experience the combined pasión of the HMLC staff, Saturday is your day.

Also appearing at our table, Rafael Navarro of Sonambulo fame. And for all you Sonambulo fans out there, Rafael's only original Sonambulo work for 2008 appears in the latest issue of Hot Mexican Love Comics. So after picking up the latest HMLC, stop by and say hello to Rafael.

See you at the Con, true believers!


I'm a Terrible Father

I'm already corrupting the mind of my impressionable baby boy.

As I've mentioned before, the latest issue of Hot Mexican Love Comics is NOW available for purchase in all fine comic book stores across the country. The entire HMLC crew (myself, Señor Ira, Bean Robot, Angry Bob and the Lady Janice) will all be on hand for next weekend's San Diego Comic Con to say hello to our adoring fans. We will have copious amounts of new issues available for a nominal fee. We'll also have back issues available, prints of the latest cover (suitable for framing) and new for 2008, HMLC shot glasses.

I'll have information about exactly where we'll be soon. Stay tuned!


Clipper Fans.... Boned Again

It's tough being a Clippers fan.

First, you have to contend with the fact that your team will forever be in the shadow of the Lakers, and second, your most well know fans are Billy Crystal, Frankie Muniz and the aforementioned Clipper Darrell, and third, your team is owned by the most apathetic man in pro sports. Combine your lame ass owner with the fact have that the team is run by what is probably the worst front office in the NBA and you've got a pretty crappy franchise.

A franchise that has squandered 20 (twenty!) lottery picks over the last 23 years, and 7 of those picks were top 3 picks! After a forgettable, injury-plagued 2007-2008 season, things were looking better for the Clippers when they somehow managed to lure away Los Angeles native and legitimate NBA superstar Baron Davis away from the Golden State Warriors. With a potential starting lineup of Davis, Elton Brand and Chris Kaman, things were looking up for the 2008-2009 season. But the Clippers being the Clippers, they fucked that all up with the quickness.

Quick derail, check out this trailer for a new (fake) movie starring Baron Davis and Steve Nash.

Mistake #1: Letting Corey Maggette walk for absolutely nothing. I happen to be a big Maggette fan because I think he's a rarity in the world of the NBA.... he's a reliable commodity. Corey may never be your star player, but he'll consistently get you five rebounds, three assists and 15 points a night, with 8 of those points coming from the free throw line. For whatever reason, thick-headed Clippers coach Mike Dunleavy chose to play Corey off the bench which clearly rubbed him the wrong way. In an ideal world, a player will remember that he's a professional and that if he's coach chooses him to be a reserve player, then it must be for the betterment of the team. But this isn't an ideal world and all Dunleavy succeeded in doing was alienate Maggette. So as soon as Corey had an option to get out of his contract with the Clippers, he bounces. Ironically, Maggette ends up signing with the Warriors, presumably to replace the departing Baron Davis.

Mistake #2: Losing Elton Brand, who also had an opt out clause in his contract, to the Philadelphia 76ers. Again, for absolutely nothing. This one I don't understand at all. Baron Davis and Elton Brand are photographed in Los Angeles together. On June 30, Brand opts out of his contract and announces that he's re-signing with the Clippers for a smaller contract. The next day, July 1, Davis opts out of his contract and announced that he has a verbal agreement to sign with the Clippers. Conveniently, Brand's smaller contract allows the Clippers to afford Davis. Sounds like a little bit of collusion, right? Well, I thought so until seven days later when ESPN announces Elton's signing with the 76ers. Elton staying in L.A. seemed like a done deal so what happened? According to Corey Maggette (no longer associated with either of the teams involved here), the Clippers basically offered Elton a take it or leave it deal. Which was exactly the wrong thing to do because Brand was under no obligation to stay. Way to go, Elgin Baylor.

Now, believe it or not, I have to give the Clippers some credit here. After bumbling away Brand and Maggette, they've managed to make a few decent personnel moves. Brand leaving cleared a tremendous amount of salary cap space so the Clippers were able to completely absorb the contract of former Defensive Player of the Year Marcus Camby from the penny pinching Denver Nuggets for essentially nothing. Plus they've signed all-around knucklehead Ricky Davis for cheap. Sure, Ricky is the guy who tried to cheat his way into a triple double when he was playing for the Cleveland Cavaliers, but at the very least he'll give the Clippers another scoring option.

Hey, who knows? Maybe this is good for the Clippers. Maybe a lineup of Baron Davis, Cuttino Mobley, Al Thornton, Ricky Davis, Marcus Camby and Chris Kaman might be ok. It doesn't look too good on paper but you never know. It's so crazy that it just might work!


I wonder who the Clippers are going to select with their 21st lottery pick next year for the 2009-2010 season.


the many moods of larrydigital, pt. 9

To download podcast: Click here.

Have I mentioned how lazy I am?

I've always been a little on the slack side but man, lately, I've had like zero energy. Now of course, my darling baby boy requires a lot of attention (just like his father!) so a big chunk of time is devoted to him but in the downtime, like when he's asleep, I've been doing absolutely nothing. It's not so much that I need a break because I'm burned out or anything like that, I just feel.... blah.

Usually I'd use that time to work on my podcast or some other pointless distraction but for the past week or so when it time to get to work, the last thing in the world I want to do was sort through Donny Hathaway records. I know, blasphemy, right? It's like, all I want to do is watch Law & Order reruns or whatever.

Anyway, this latest episode was a little slow going but I think it turned out ok. I've been trying to work some of these acts into previous episodes but it didn't quite come together, especially TV on the Radio and Sufjan Stevens. But I think it works this time.

As I've mentioned ad naseum, comments are always welcome. Feel free to let me know what you think by posting here or dropping me a line at larrydigital@gmail.com. Or, if you're feeling really bold, leave me a review at my iTunes page.

Episode 9: The Cool Before The Warm Tracklist

1. larry's intro
2. "Brother's Gonna Work It Out" by Willie Hutch
3. "Groove Me" by King Floyd
4. larry's interlude #1
5. "The Rain" by Oran "Juice" Jones
6. "Cinderfella Dana Dane" by Dana Dane
7. larry's interlude #2
8. "If This Ain't Love" by Nicole Willis & The Soul Investigators
9. "Valerie" by Mark Ronson & Amy Winehouse
10. "This Time (I'm Gonna Try It My Way)" by DJ Shadow
11. larry's interlude #3
12. "Come On! Feel the Illinoise!" by Sufjan Stevens
13. "Silent Sigh" by Badly Drawn Boy
14. "My Ever Changing Moods" by The Style Council
15. larry's interlude #4
16. "Highway 61 Revisted" by Karen O & The Million Dollar Bashers
17. "There's Only One Thing Left To Say" by Velocity Girl
18. larry's interlude #5/outro
19. "Wolf Like Me" by TV On The Radio

This month's theme song is "7 Wonders of the World" by Prince Buster.


Dammit, Lakers

I don't have the words.


Fire Up the Machine!

Despite what I may have previously written, I'm not really rooting for the Celtics. I say that I am only to lessen the potential blow of missing out on $1,000, but as I mentioned before, I'm a Laker fan through and through.

So imagine my disappointment when the Lakers went down 2-0 in the Finals against the Celtics. Now, regardless of what some people say (including my brother-in-law who knows nothing about the NBA), the Lakers weren't outplayed. They just lost. The Celtics were hitting their shots and the Lakers weren't. So for those first two games, the Celtics were the better team. Game 3 in Los Angeles, however, wasn't all that much better as Lamar Odom and Pau Gasol continued to suck ass and even though the Lakers got off to a hot start, for a minute there it looked like the Lakers were going to blow it. Again.

Luckily for the Lakers, Sasha "The Machine" Vujacic decided to show up. He scored a career playoff high of 20 points on 7 of 10 shooting to help the Lakers stay alive (for the time being at least) against the Celtics. Here's the thing though.... even though Sasha kicked a tremendous amount of ass, he's terribly inconsistent. So there's a chance he might shoot 2 for 7 in Game 4 on Thursday, which is exactly what he did in Game 1. But hey, that's still two days away. For now, I'm just going to be happy. Can you tell how ecstatic I am in the shot above?

I've actually hated Sasha for most of his NBA career because he's probably one of the softest players I've ever seen. And my favorite NBA player is Dirk Nowitzki so trust me, I know soft-ass players when I see them. Don't get me wrong, Sasha definitely had some things going for him. He was one of those pesky defenders that you absolutely hate to watch. Unless they're on your favorite team, of course because then, they're not annoying, they're just "hard-working." Plus I kind of admired him because from what I hear, he's a little bit of a playboy, even if he does have propensities for skanks and cougars.

Positive qualities aside, I just felt like Sasha wasn't the type of player that the Lakers needed to help the team should they ever get back to the NBA Finals. Truth be told, I sort of turned the corner on Sasha during the summer because I read an interview with him where he basically said that he was ready. His NBA career up until then had basically been all preparation and now he was ready to be that player that the Lakers needed. I didn't believe him at the time, and I still don't, but I definitely admired his confidence. And I've got to give the guy credit, he completely stepped his game up this season.

I have to admit, during the pre-season, I was looking at Sasha as a walking expiring contract. Now, I hope that Mitch Kupchak resigns him!

Lakers basketball.... It's Sasha-tastic!


Go Celtics!

If you're one of the three people that read this blog then you know that I am an avid Laker fan. But this year, I'm going for the Celtics!

So let me explain.

For the last couple of years, I've been betting on the Lakers to win the NBA Championship. Seems like a decent bet right now but trust me, for the last couple of years, it's been a sucker's bet. I usually place my bet at Caesars Palace in Vegas and the first year I did it, right after the Shaquille O'Neal to Miami trade, the guy at the window looked at me and said, You know they traded Shaq, right?

Yes, I knew, but as the saying goes, I'm a fan of the name on the front of the jersey, not the name on the back. And you know, the odds weren't that bad that first year. Lakers had an 8-to-1 shot to win, which is pretty good. I guess because the Lakers were still the Western Conference champs, even if Shaq was no longer on the team.

Anyway, I might as well have just burned my cash the last couple of years since the Lakers had no chance at the title. Which didn't really bug me because, like I said, I'm a Laker fan.

Well, fast forward to this past summer. I went to Vegas in June but when I went to Caesars, they didn't let me make my bet since the 2007 Finals between the San Antonio Spurs and the Cleveland Cavaliers were still underway. Ok, no big deal, I was going to Vegas again two months later in August. I'd make my bet then.

So August rolls around and guess what, I forget to make the bet. Totally slips my mind. I didn't realize what I had done until we were on the road, halfway back to Los Angeles. Oh well, no big deal, I thought. Since the Lakers had no real shot at the title, right? I'll make my bet again next summer and this year, I guess I'll just save my $50 bucks. And since at the time, there was a very good chance that Kobe Bryant was going to get traded, I was beginning to feel like my blunder was a stroke of luck.

Well, the joke was on me because the season starts three months later and guess what... Kobe was still on the team and the Lakers were looking pretty good. Then they go and trade for Pau Fucking Gasol and the Lakers were suddenly contenders for the Finals.

Fucking great.

I make a bet every year and one year I don't, they've actually got a shot to win it all. Back in August, when I should've made the bet, the odds on the Lakers winning were 20-to-1. My cheap $50 bet would earn me $1,000 if the Lakers win it all. Which they very well could! Dammit!

So yeah, even though I really, really hate the Celtics, part of me is hoping they win. Only because as much as I love the Lakers, I can't help but think about the $1,000 I'm missing out on. Anyway, even if the Lakers lose in the Finals (which I don't really want them to do), they'll have a shot next year when Andrew Bynum returns. Too bad the odds on them winning the Finals will back to, like, 8-to-1. Which is still decent I guess, but if you compare it to the 20-to-1 odds I could've had, 8-to-1 seems a little crappy.

And real quick: Fuck the Celtics. They have no right to be in the NBA Finals. Last year, 90% of the Celtics' fans quit on the team and actually cheered when they lost. Only because at the time, each loss potentially increased Boston's chances of landing Greg "Where Da White Women At?" Oden or Kevin Durant in the draft. But since there is some justice in the sports world, tanking (which is exactly what the Celtics did) never works and they miss out on both those guys. But then, out of the fucking blue, the ghost of Red Auerbach rises from the blackest pits of Hell and somehow forces Minnesota Timberwolves general manager (and former Celtic!) Kevin McHale to trade Kevin Garnett to the Celtics for a song. Which, overnight, makes the Celtics Finals contender as well. Say what you want about Lakers fans being bandwagoners but the fans never quit on the team to the point where they would cheer each loss. My point, Boston shouldn't get rewarded for quitting on their team.


The Ruler's Back?

If you happen to be a listener of my podcast, the many moods of larrydigital, then you know that I'm a fan of rap music, particularly "old school" rap. Now, the phrase "old school" can be a little tricky as it could mean a number of different things in relation to rap music. Mostly because rap music, like all music really, is an evolving entity and as the genre progresses, more and more acts become "old school" as more and more rap listeners grow older. Just like how to my dad, "classic rock" meant Chuck Berry and Little Richard, to me "classic rock" means Led Zepplin and Pink Floyd and to my newborn son, "classic rock" might mean Foo Fighters and The Killers. Make sense?

Since I'm an older guy, old school rap to me means anything prior to "The Bridge" by MC Shan, which is about 1985. And as I mentioned in Episode 1: Fever in the Funkhouse of the many moods of larrydigital, one of my favorite old school rappers is Slick Rick. I must be a fan since I included in his song "Hey Young World" in my debut episode, right?

Now, Slick Rick (born Ricky Walters) is a good ol' fashioned hip-hop legend. As a semi-member of Doug E. Fresh's Get Fresh Crew, Rick scored two massive hits right out the gate with the 1984 single "The Show" and its b-side "La Di Da Di". The hits kept on coming up through 1988 when Rick released his debut album, "The Great Adventures of Slick Rick".

All was well and good until Rick managed to fuck everything up just two years later in 1990. He was arrested for two counts of attempted murder when he shot his cousin and an innocent bystander. His cousin, mind you, later admitted to trying to murder Rick so really, Rick's attempt at murder was some jackass version of revenge. Which is fucking mind-boggling to me. Here's a tip Rick: Call the fucking cops.

Anyway, Rick goes to jail and is eventually released in 1998 after serving 6 years of his 10 year sentence.

Now here's where it gets even more convoluted...

While Rick managed to stay out of trouble after his release from prison, in 2002 he is hired to perform on a cruise ship and is promptly arrested when the ship returns to port. Turns out that Rick was actually born in England and moved to the U.S. when he was 11. After the September 11th attacks in 2001, a law was passed that actually deports all non-U.S. citizens convicted of violent felonies. So while no one minded that he was still in the country after his conviction, officials had serious problems with his attempt to re-enter the country. He ends up serving another 17 months in prison while the Immigration and Naturalization Service tries to have him deported. Never mind the fact that Rick has no ties in his "home" country as he no longer has famiy there and he's lived in the Bronx with his wife and children (all U.S. citizens) since the mid-80s. Rick, of course, fights the case. The whole thing gets dropped in 2003 when the INS essentially gives up and Rick is released from prison. Again. All was well and good again until 2006 when out of the blue, the Department of Homeland Security begins yet another attempt at deporting Rick.

But then, word broke yesterday that New York state's latest governor David A. Paterson has issued a full and complete pardon of Slick Rick for his attempted murder conviction. Reports say that the pardon was issued in attempt to assist Rick in fighting his latest deportation case. There's not even a guarantee that the pardon would help Rick stay in the country, there's just the possibility that it might.

To me, this whole situation is all kinds of honked up. Now, don't get me wrong. I'm a fan. I saw Slick Rick perform live back in 1998 when he performed at the House of Blues on Sunset. He was scheduled to come on at 9:00pm but he didn't actually take the stage until 1:30am. Not the most professional guy around obviously, but damn it, he was worth the wait.

What I don't think he's worth is all the man hours our government is spending trying to "get" him. I mean, yes, Slick Rick is definitely a bonehead. No one is denying that. After all, he did try to kill someone. But he also served his time and by doing so, he's paid his debt to society, hasn't he? So why the hell would so many people spend so much time and effort to deal with a man who's reported had no legal trouble (of his own creation, I mean) since his conviction over 17 years ago? Apparently, he's remained on the straight and narrow so why would the INS and the Department of Homeland Security target this rapper? It's not he's Juelz Santana or anything, who plainly professed his admiration for 9/11 hijacker Mohammed Ata's courage.

In this day and age, when our government clearly has more pressing matters to deal with, why all the fuss for a musician that most people over the age of 30 don't even remember? Why the hell would someone like the governor of New York bother weighing in on the matter? Doesn't he of all people have more important things to do as well? The answer: yes. While some may see Paterson's involvement as an abuse of power, I just see it as your government at work. Bureaucracy for bureaucracy's sake. And, as a government employee myself, I know what I'm talking about. Sure, I've got a million other useless things to do but I can always find something new and equally useless but with a little more publicity to occupy my time.

Clearly, it must be one of two reasons, either he really loves "Children's Story" or he's after that oh-so-coveted hip-hop voting bloc when it comes time for his re-election.


the many moods of larrydigital, pt. 8

To download podcast: Click here.

Since I originally intended for this podcast to be my special Cinco de Mayo episode, the plan was to have it available on May 5th. But as I mention in the actual podcast, no matter how many times I mixed and remixed it, I just wasn't satisfied the end result so I missed by deadline.

Anyway, I ended up scrapping half the podcast and mixed in new(ish) music. So what you'll hear is this weird amalgamation of latin influenced music and just plain ol' soul music. You know, the usual. I think it works though and I'm much more satisfied with the final piece.

And since it seems to be the biggest complaint about my podcasts, the three of you that actually listen to the many moods of larrydigital will be happy to know that I seem to have solved the problem of my own vocals sounding far too low. Let me know if they still need work.

Real quick, I'd like to take a moment to plead for your assistance. Now, I'm grateful for those who actually download to the many moods of larrydigital but I'm really looking for some feedback from actual listeners. I do get e-mails which is cool but I'm hoping to get something a little.... more. Specifically, I'm looking for reviews. Not to be posted here but on my iTunes page. So if you've got a spare minute, please click this link and type out a review of the many moods of larrydigital. It doesn't need to favorable, although I'd be grateful if it was, I'd just like something there. You know, just so I know what my listeners (all 3 of you) think.

Episode 8: All Celebrity Voices Are Impersonated Tracklist

1. larry's intro
2. "Spill the Wine" by War
3. "Tell Her She's Lovely" by El Chicano
4. "It's Now Or Never" by El Vez
5. larry's interlude #1
6. "Something's Changed" by Sharon Jones & the Dap-Kings
7. "Can't Turn Me Away" by Sylvia Striplin
8. larry's interlude #2
9. "Too Hot To Stop" by The Bar-Kays
10. "Get Up and Get Down" by The Dramatics
11. larry's interlude #3
12. "Love the One You're With" by The Isley Brothers
13. "One Look Over My Shoulder" by Average White Band
14. larry's interlude #4
15. "Surgery" by World Class Wreckin' Cru
16. "Everlasting Bass" by Rodney O & Joe Cooley
17. "When I Hear Music" by Debbie Deb
18. larry's interlude #5/outro
19. "La Misma Canción" by Ozomatli

This month's theme song is "Peanuts" by Herb Alpert's Tijuana Brass.


Meet the New Boss...

...same as the old boss.

Yesterday, my son Jacob Evan decided that he had spent enough time incubating so he showed up a little early. Two weeks early, to be exact. He was close to term which means that he was a decent size (6 pounds, 8 ounces) and a pretty good sized length (20 and a half inches).

The interesting thing about him was that he was pretty furry. I mean, he has a full head of hair and all but more than that, he has these wispy baby hairs all along his ears, arms, legs and shoulders. So he's not quite a wolf baby or anything like that but I have to admit, I really wasn't expecting him to be so... fuzzy.

Luckily, I took a parenting class a few weeks back where they informed us that this condition wasn't uncommon. It's called "lanugo" and all it does is protect the baby while he's in the womb. The hairs are no big deal as they usually disappear a few weeks after birth. So it's nothing out of the ordinary and it happens to a lot of babies. Good thing I knew that prior to his birth because I'd never heard of lanugo before and had I not known about it, my wife definitely would have had some 'splaining to do.


The Love Rises Again!

Ahh, Spring.

One of my favorite times of the year. The sun is shining, the birds are singing, the flowers are blooming. And love... love is definitely in the air. Hot Mexican Love, that is.

As I've mentioned before, I'm one of the co-creators of Hot Mexican Love Comics, the sexiest independent comic book on the market today. As I type this, the latest issue is congealing into our latest comedy bonanza. I just wanted to take a moment to make sure that you, my readers (aka Jim), are aware of the upcoming release so you can head on down to your local comic store (click here if you don't know where that is) and ask your retailer, nay, demand that your retailer order enough copies of Hot Mexican Love Comics 2008 (aka Da Dirty Ocho) for you and all your friends. Actually, now that I think about it, you might want to pick up multiple copies. You know, just in case.

Be sure to check out the lucha libre espectacular "Encuentro de la Semana" featuring the work of yours truly and the lovely and talented Mr. Ethan Spaulding. You won't be disappointed... but if by some chance you are, I suppose it wouldn't really matter because you'd have already paid for the book. Sorry.

The book is available for pre-order at finer comic book establishments now and should be in stores by mid-July.


So it begins...

As some of you know, my wife is expecting. Getting close too, she has about 6 weeks left.

So this weekend I'm putting together some new baby furniture and while I'm toiling away with my Allen wrenches I notice that she slyly took down my 50th anniversary commemorative poster of The Third Man from the wall of the what is soon to be the baby room. Silent as the grave, she removed it from the spot it's been in since I moved in 5 years ago and tucked it behind an old bookshelf.

What are you doing?, I ask, genuinely wanting to know what she's doing.

Putting this away
, she says casually, as if removing Orson from his home is some acceptable thing to do.

Why move it at all?, I ask.

The baby won't like this scary picture looking at him, she says.

My son will not be frightened by classic works of cinema, I say. In fact, I'm hoping that poster will inspire him to appreciate the film making artform.

The baby won't like it, she concludes.

Are you saying that my son won't like Orson Welles?, I ask, feeling the room temperature rise a bit.

Larry, the baby won't care who Orson Welles is, she says definitively.

Orson Welles is a genius!, I declare.

Orson Welles is fat!, she retorts.

Stunned, and slightly wounded, I knew not what to say. How dare she imply that my son won't be a fan of the creative genius of the late, great Mr. Welles? Deflated, I left the room. Temporarily resigning Orson to his hidden fate.

Stay tuned. Divorce proceedings may be forthcoming.


the many moods of larrydigital, pt. 7

To download podcast: Click here.

As I've mentioned before, one of the reasons I started making my own podcasts was because of the overall lameness of terrestrial radio. I got tired of hearing the same 12 songs and hour and I wanted to offer something different. I think it's hard to find new music (either entirely brand new artists or just new to you) these days. For some reason, I'm slightly irritated by the fact that a lot of people only know certain songs from television commercials rather than from the albums where they're originally from. But I suppose that happens since radio airplay can be hard to come by these days and artists (or rather, record companies) are forced to explore other areas to get exposure for their music, both new and old.

My wife, who wasn't exposed to the same music I was when I was younger, is a good example of what I mean. I'll play a song in the car and she'll say, Oh that's that Toyota song. I'll say, No, that's Curtis Mayfield. Or she'll say, That's the Gap song. And I'll say, No, that's the O'Jays. These songs had long histories before they were co-opted by some faceless ad agency.

So imagine my dismay when mere minutes after I uploaded Episode 7, I turn on the television and hear a familiar sound coming from its speakers.... Marlena Shaw's "California Soul", from this very episode, was featured in some damn Dockers commercial. I know it's ridiculous but I was kind of upset by it. Almost like, Hey, I found this song first!

Sounds stupid, right? Right. I should just be happy that a great piece of work has been rescued from the brinks of obscurity and now people are enjoying it for the fantastic song that it is. But still....

I found this song before those lame ass Dockers hacks!

Episode 7: Don't Fight The Feeling Tracklist

1. "Funky Worm" by Ohio Players
2. larry's intro
3. "Bold, Soul Sister" by Ike & Tina Turner
4. "Hard Times" by Baby Huey & The Babysitters
5. larry's interlude #1
6. "California Soul" by Marlena Shaw
7. "Improve" by Darrow Fletcher
8. larry's interlude #2
9. "Sneakin' Sally Through the Alley" by Robert Palmer
10. "Beauty Queen" by Roxy Music
11. "Speak Like A Child" by The Style Council
12. larry's interlude #3
13. "I Don't Feel Like Dancing" by the Scissor Sisters
14. "Feel Good Hit of the Fall" by !!!
15. larry's interlude #4
16. "Get Myself Into It" by The Rapture
17. "Dirty Harry (Schtung Chinese New Year Remix)" by Gorillaz
18. larry's interlude #5/outro
19. "Dr. Lee, PhD" by Beastie Boys

This month's theme song is "Superstition" by Yesterday's New Quintet.


TOYS! @ Gallery 1988

My good friend Ross Richie often says that the most awesome toy ever invented is a monkey with a backpack. Meaning that to a child, a monkey with a backpack action figure could offer an endless array of scenarios. The monkey could be heading to work, he could be going to school, or it could be a parachute, was he in the army? Or maybe it was a jetpack. The point of all of that is that the simplest item can inspire so many different ideas.

Earlier today, hat very idea was on full display at Gallery 1988 TOYS! exhibit. Originally, I thought that this was going to be a show celebrating the history of Hot Wheels or whatever but it turned out to be a "celebration" of the type of games and toys I had when I was a kid, not just Hot Wheels exclusively. The "pre-video game era" they called it.

Now, there was some really interesting stuff there, like Ben Walker's Gumby vs. The Robots and Danielle Rizzolo's The Confederate Armed 'HMS PLAYMOBIL' Engaged in Enemy Attack, Flying the Confederate Ensign and there was some stuff that I personally didn't enjoy all that much. Like gay biker My Little Pony. WHAT. Still, it was a pretty awesome show. It was cool to be reminded of toys that I hadn't thought about in years. Hungry Hungry Hippos, anyone? How about Madballs?

I really enjoyed Johnny Crap's Kickin' It Old Skool, mostly because I had one of those popcorn machines when I was a kid. It was my favorite toy, I loved that stupid thing. But my favorite piece was Keith Noordzy's Norm's One of the Little People. Very cool. A friend of mine said that Camilla D'Errico's Glow Friends was the best piece there but she's wrong. That one was just plain creepy.

I think the people working at Gallery 1988 got a little pissed because I was taking pictures of the art but fuck 'em. Besides myself, there was exactly zero other people attending the showing. At least when I was there. TOYS! at Gallery 1988 runs through April 25, 2008. Go check it out. It's free, cheap asses.


London Calling @ Beady Minces

I got a chance to head down to the Beady Minces Gallery in Venice for apart's London Calling exhibit today. I heard a lot of good stuff about this show so I'm glad I got a chance to check it out before it was over.

This exhibit featured a lot of international artists. I saw a lot of great stuff. I saw this great photography called "MPH 6" by John Counsell. Basically it was a shot of someone or something moving through a forest at high speed. Click here to check it out. Also pretty cool was a sculpture(?) by Dominic Allan called "Here's Looking at You Kid," essentially a mannequin of a little girl covered with like 30,000 plastic googly eyes. I noticed almost all the googly eyes were identical with slightly larger pairs placed randomly throughout. Weird. Luis Perez's "Classic Mini" painting (seriously, it's a painting) was pretty amazing as well. Check it out here.

But my absolute favorite was a massive wallhanger by Sean Alexander called Red. Basically it was a huge portrait of Michael Caine which was made of strips of wood textured.... paper? I guess. It was very cool. Turns out that without even knowing it, I was sort of familiar with Mr. Alexander's work. He’s the guy behind the album cover for Paul Weller's Illumination a few years back.

After Beady Minces, I was also able to make it down to West L.A. to see the Year of the Rat exhibit at GR2. Also very cool. I’d been meaning to check it out since it opened last month, I'd just been a little busy. But, I got down there and sure enough, they were partying like its 4706 up in there. GR2 is an interesting place. I suppose it's a store since they sell various items, such as my super useful Nyokki! Egg Pet Plant and stuffed flowers by Takashi Murakami but it's also a mini-gallery. They had some very interesting pieces. I absolutely loved this piece from Andrew Holder. This one was really cool too. Man, I really wish I had some additional wall space at home.

The London Calling exhibit runs from March 10 to April 6th (tomorrow). So much like the Giant Robot show I previously wrote about, if you’re only now hearing about London Calling, chances are you missed it. You snooze you lose again, suckas!

Year of the Rat runs at GR2 through April 16. Check it out!


On the Shelf

Sherlock Holmes: The Unauthorized Biography by Nick Rennison

I'm as interested in Sherlock Holmes as the next guy and while I've seen a couple of Basil Rathbone movies on cable, I'm not exactly what you'd call a Holmes afficiando. But I've always wanted to actual get into Arthur Conan Doyle's mythos. I just never knew where to start. I suppose I could just start "at the beginning" or whatever but series like this, with characters that have huge literary backgrounds, are always a little daunting to me. Part of me feels that I'd read the entire series to get a clear understanding of the character and usually that's a metric assload of material.

So when I heard about a new "biography" about Sherlock Holmes was being published, I knew that this what I was looking for. And sure enough, Nick Rennison does a great job of scouring Conan Doyle's Sherlock Holmes stories for personal info about Holmes and his male companion, Dr. Watson, and compiled them all into a nice little package. This book is a written in a style familiar to Sherlock Holmes fans ("Sherlockians"). It's written from the perspective that Holmes was an actual historical person and not a literary invention. Thus, history and fiction is mingled through the entire "biography."

Since I wasn't all that familiar with Holmes, I found it pretty interesting. I had no idea that the character of Sherlock's older brother Mycroft even existed until I read about him in Alan Moore's League of Extraordinary Gentlemen series. Here, Mycroft is dealt with quite a bit and as the author shows, the older Holmes is just as formidable as his more famous younger brother.

Another thing that I found kind of interesting was Sherlock's fairly serious cocaine addiction. I'd always heard references to Holmes' penchant for coke but I never really thought about it. I've always known that in the late 19th century cocaine was mostly seen as a harmless stimulant, and viewed the way we view stuff like Red Bull or Rock Star energy drinks today, I guess. I suppose it was fairly commonplace then but today it may seem a little shocking. The author refers to The Sign of Four in which Dr. Watson describes Holmes, in one of his drug-induced fits, as having "sinewy forearms and wrist, all dotted and scarred with innumerable puncture-marks." Holmes himself explains his drug use away as something to kill time with between cases. Manic drug use can lead to uncanny reasoning abilities? Not a very elementary correlation, I'd say.

If you're unfamiliar with the Holmes mythos then this can be a very interesting book. The only problem that I had with it is that my knowledge of the Sherlock Holmes universe, as well as my knowledge of Victorian history, is spotty at best. So I'm having a tough time distinguishing between historical and fictional characters and events. But while that can be a bit bothersome (to me), it hardly detracts from this very entertaining read.


Super*Market @ Meltdown

As some of you know, I'm one of the co-creators of Hot Mexican Love Comics and as such, I, along with my cohorts Bean Robot and Señor Ira, usually make the comic convention rounds to hawk our wares. This Sunday, Ira and myself made it on down to Meltdown Comics in Hollywood to participate in their Super*Market showcase. We didn't really have anything new to push since our 2008 book is still being put together but we decided to show up anyway.

It was a pretty relaxed show. Very small, but enjoyable. Sales were less than spectacular, I think we made a grand total of $34, a dollar less than the $35 entry fee but still, it was fun. Our friends Louie Del Carmen and Rob Goodin were there pushing their own books too so at least we knew some people there.

We made a new friend in Jose Cabrera who publishes the supremely awesome Crying Macho Man series. Check out Louie's and Jose's pages for more pics from Super*Market. I also scored a sweet stuffed piece of bacon from Dan Goodsell, the genius behind the very, very fine Mr. Toast.

Anyway, thanks to all of our friends, old and new, for their support. Hope to see you all again at the San Diego Comic Con in July.


Los Angeles Is A Cesspool

Generally speaking, I don't like to attend live sporting events. Mostly because I'm a big sports fan and while I do get a bit of a rush being there in person, I can't help being aware of just how much of the game I'm missing. I've grown accustomed to all the slow motion, freeze frame instant replays, the oh-so-useful tidbits from announcers (a good example, Reggie Miller explaining what a "titty" is) and thanks to NBA League Pass sometimes I get to see super low budget regional commercials starring average joe ball players.

Sure, I'm super stoked that I was lucky enough to attend Kobe Bryant's 81 point game against the Toronto Raptors in 2006 but part of me wishes that I watched it in the comfort of my own living room, on my 48 inch big screen TV, endlessly looping Tivo to my heart's content.

So with my dislike of live sporting events established, why did I agree to attend an exhibition game between the Los Angeles Dodgers and the Boston Red Sox at the Coliseum?

Because I'm a moron, that's why.

First of all, exhibition games are worthless. Exhibition baseball games are even more so. No team is going to risk playing their star players in what is essentially a practice game so you usually end up watching players that never actually play (legitimate benchwarmers), or guys that are about to be sent down to the minors. This particular game was even more useless because for some dumb ass reason, the official season has already started for the Boston Red Sox. So get this, the Sox traveled to Japan last week, played two games against the Oakland A's that actually count towards their regular season record, and then they came back to play two totally bullshit exhibition games against the Dodgers.

Had I thought it out I probably would've skipped the whole damn thing but I guess I was too caught up in a "Hey, let's go to a Dodger game!" moment. So not only was the game completely meaningless, but it was being played at the Los Angeles Memorial Coliseum. The reason is was being played here was that this year is the 50th anniversary of the Dodgers' move to Los Angeles and the Coliseum is where they played while Dodger Stadium was being built. Plus this game was promoted to support of the Dodgers' new ThinkCure charity so the tickets had a face value of $2 each with 100% of the proceeds being donated to charity. Which means that the 100,000+ capacity Coliseum sold out instantly.

I already wrote about attending a sporting event with the dregs of humanity a few weeks back. Well, take that experience and multiply it by fifty. I had no idea that the organizers of this event were attempting to break the all time attendance record for a baseball game, which explains the cheap ass price for the tickets. The whole event was a disaster. It was poorly planned and poorly executed top to bottom.

I knew that with that many people attending, getting in and out of there was going to be a nightmare. But I figured, hey, I'm a smart guy, I'll take the Metro! I thought it'd be the best course of action anyway. One, there'd be a ton of traffic so I'd skip that and two, I was meeting a friend there so I'd have a back up ride home in case the Metro was bogus. Which it was.

I remembered Bean Robot's take on public transportation but I thought, how bad could it be? I rode public buses 20 years ago and that was kinda ok, so it shouldn't be that terrible, right? Wrong. Now, the trip itself was surprisingly efficient. One train there from my house, bus stop was right outside the train station, train goes directly to the Coliseum. Easy. Except for the horde of mentally ill homeless people that I was trapped on the bus with. And it got better. Whether it was the muscled Korean dude that held his 85 pound girlfriend off the ground with one arm that got on at Olympic, or the mariachi trio that boarded on Exposition, each stop brought an new and exciting cast of characters on to the bus. It got so fascinating to me that I almost didn't want to get off the bus. Then the homeless guy 2 rows back started dry heaving and I jumped off with the quickness.

I finally arrive at the Coliseum and I call my friend to find out where we're meeting. Our conversation went like this....

"It's Larry. I'm here, where are you?"

"Yeah, I'm not going. Too much traffic."

"You realize that I'm at the Coliseum right now."

"Yeah but I decided to cut my loses and skip it. Sorry."

Fucking great. I thought about heading home but I figured that after all the bullshit I went through to get there, I might as well watch the damn game. But now I was stuck at the Coliseum with no backup plan home. I was totally dependent on public transportation to get home. Screw it, I'd figure that out later.

Inside the Coliseum was another nightmare. Apparently someone thought it'd be a great idea to set up the concession stands in the walkways surrounding the inside of the stadium. This forced people to line up perpendicular to the throng of people attempting to make their way to their seats. It was a natural barrier every 20 feet. Also keep in mind that the Coliseum is almost 85 years old. The gateways and aisles were constructed for much, much slimmer people. I can guaran-fucking-tee you that the Parkinsons never even dreamed that their grand stadium would someday be jam packed with 300 pound parents, in undersized Dodger jerseys, standing in ridiculously long lines just to purchase cotton candy for their already obese children. Anyway, after 25 minutes of slogging through the great unwashed masses seemingly composed entirely of drunken Raider fans, I finally make it to my aisle. Moving up the stairs, an usher directs me to my seat. I'm in Row 90.... out of 93. To give you a better idea of where I am in the Coliseum, I took the picture above, then spun 180° and took this picture. So yeah, I was in the nosebleed section.

For the next 2½ hours I get to watch Dodger luminaries like Greg Jones and Mike Koplove get pounded by Red Sox superstars Bobby Kielty and Jed Lowrie. I wanted to cut out early but before I knew it, it was the 7th inning. And this being Los Angeles, the 7th inning is when a lot of fans start heading for the door, you know, to beat the traffic. Which would be a pretty good plan if 40% of the fans in attendance didn't have the exact same idea. So, again being really super smart, I decided to watch the whole game, figuring that it'd be easier to navigate my way out of the Coliseum with fewer people around.

Another bad move.

Once I got out of the stands and into the outside walkways, I discover that apparently 50,000 other people had the exact same idea that I did. When the game was finally over, all I had to do was head back to the bus stop where I got dropped off at and head over to the train station. 20 minutes tops! More like 20 minutes to get outside the Coliseum, another 40 to make it through the throng of people to the bus stop and then another 90 minutes to get on an actual bus.

Finally, thanks to the kindly assistance of two girls who were far more versed in the ways of public transportation than I, I finally make it on to my train to begin my journey home. More than two hours after the game ended. This experience was so shitty that it actual tainted my view of the Dodgers this year. Something tells me that I'm not going to make too many trips out to Dodger Stadium this season.

All You Can Eat Pavilion or no All You Can Eat Pavilion.


the many moods of larrydigital, pt. 6

To download podcast: Click here.

Ok, so this episode came out a little later than I wanted it to. I never intended for February's bonus episode to replace the March episode but that's almost what happened. I guess I got a little ahead of myself with the whole "I had time on my hands" thing.

Episode 6: Everything Can Be Replaced Tracklist

1. larry's intro
2. "9th Wonder (Blackitolism)" by Digable Planets
3. "Haboglabotribin" by Bernard Wright
4. "Fried Neckbone & Some Home Fries (DTA Remix)" by Willie Bobo
5. larry's interlude #1
6. "Dance, Dance" by The Lebron Brothers Orchestra
7. "Don't Let No One Get You Down" by War
8. larry's interlude #2
9. "Sway" by Rosemary Clooney & Pérez Prado
10. "It Had Better Be Tonight" by Lena Horne
11. "But I Was Cool" by Oscar Brown Jr.
12. larry's interlude #3
13. "Jump Around (Pete Rock Remix)" by House of Pain
14. "Frontin'" by Taggy Matcher
15. larry's interlude #4
16. "Music" by The Dynamics
17. "I Shall Be Released" by Freddie McGregor
18. larry's interlude #5/outro
19. "Fade Away" by Junior Byles

This month's theme song is "Mañana (Is Good Enough For Me)" by Jackie Davis.


Just When I Think I'm Out...

They pull me back in.

I guess I'm not exactly what you'd call a party animal. Once maybe but definitely not these days. So while I'm still a pretty social guy, more often than not I prefer the comfort of my own company. These days I usually spend my free time reading, or writing, or working on my podcast. And being a totally awesome husband, of course!

As a result, I guess you can say that I'm into video games. Or at least I used to be really into video games. As recently as 5 years ago, it wasn't unusual for me to spend 7 hours playing video games. But these days, not so much. I think I just got burned out and lost interest. I still bust out my PSP from time to time (Me & My Katamari forever!) but I haven't dusted off my PlayStation in over a year.

So imagine my surprise when I suddenly found myself bitten by the video game once again. I thought I'd completely kicked the habit but alas, I was wrong. And what was it that brought me back into the comforting electronic arms of a video game console..... Guitar Hero.

Now, this game isn't exactly new. It's been out for a while but I was never that interested in it. I mean, sure, I thought about buying it but I only had a PS2 and I didn't feel like spending hundreds of bucks on a new console for one game. But then I found out that the latest version, Guitar Hero III, was going to be released on the Nintendo Wii platform. I'd been thinking about getting a Wii anyway, since it was cheaper than an Xbox 360 and a PS3, and finding out that Guitar Hero would be available for it just sort of sealed the deal.

First of all, the game is amazing. The variety of songs they have available is amazing. I'm big into music and everything but never did I expect to be so excited to play a Pat Benatar song. Seriously, I was into it. I even into a bunch of songs that I would never listen to outside the game. Crap like Disturbed and Slipknot. Normally, you couldn't pay me to listen to trash like Slipknot but here I am rocking out to their song "Before I Forget" in Career Mode. I recently read that there are new band-specific expansions on the way so I'm totally jazzed. The rumor of Guitar Hero: The Beatles has me stoked.

But the fun didn't stop there with Guitar Hero. Oh no.

Last weekend, my sister-in-law mentioned a game for the Wii called American Idol: Karaoke Revolution and asked if she could keep the game at my place. Since she didn't have a Wii herself, you know. Thinking she was kidding I said yes. An hour later we were coming home from Best Buy with the game in hand. We turned it on and as I'm sure you've guessed it's a karaoke game, complete with a plug in microphone.

First impression, this game was retarded. There was no way I was playing this dumb ass game.

Two songs later... ok, give me the mic.

The highlight of my American Idol experience was when after I finished off a particularly amazing version of "Heart of Glass," a pixelated Simon Cowell craned his awkwardly rendered head towards me and asked "Where have you been hiding?"

I learned something about myself that day.

I learned that I can sing Corinne Bailey Rae songs like a motherfucker.


Ron Weasley: Marked for Death

This morning I stumbled upon an article from last year that suggests natural redheads could be extinct within 100 years.

Apparently, redheads were originally the result of a mutation amount Europeans that increased the body's ability to create Vitamin D from sunlight. Over time, as redheads moved around the globe, the gene pool got a little diluted so now, the chances of two natural redheads meeting and reproducing have decreased, leading to the shrinking number of natural redheads. Sure, in some cases, a redheaded child can be born from a couple with only one redheaded parent but the chances are not as likely they would be if both parents were redheads.

There's a chance that rather than going completely extinct, the redheaded gene can just go dormant and return in a few centuries but that's all speculation at this point.

For now, only one thing thing can be said sure... your days are numbered, Conan O'Brien.


Can't I Just Owe You?

I've always believed that CDs should be more expensive.

Sure, an average CD costs about $15 these days and it's a lot already but I've always felt that CDs should really cost anywhere between 25 and 30 bucks. My main line of thinking here is that if an actual album costs more then artists will have to work harder to earn their piece of the consumer pie since less people will be inclined to make the bigger investment. Those who do spend that cash though would be much more satisfied, right? That all depends on whether or not the recording artist actually wants to earn your hard-earned cash. Some will say that artists already work hard enough as it is, why should they have to do even more work for us fickle fans? To those people I ask, how's that latest Maroon 5 record?

So like, if I, larrydigital, was going to put down $30 for an album, then the album better be worth $30. Know what I mean? I also believe that movies should run a minimum of three hours, books should be at least 900 pages and meals should always be seven courses. Always.

When I read that Jill Sobule, primarily known for her 1995 semi-hit "I Kissed A Girl," created a website to solicit funding for her latest album, it got me thinking. Independent artists have existed far longer than the institutions they're independent from, but is this really where we've come to? I mean, no offense to Jill Sobule or anything, I'm absolutely positive that she's a 1000 times more talented than I am but if she's that talented, shouldn't have other outlets available to her? I know the record industry is in the toilet and all and that's a tremendous shame. Smaller artists like Jill Sobule have to work much, much harder to get their work out but hey, even John Mayer got a record deal, didn't he?

And don't get me wrong. I have great admiration for the independent artist. I even kind of like to consider myself one, since my podcast is independently produced (in the case of my podcast, "independent" means "not listened to") and plus there's the whole independent comic thing I participate in.

My main issue is this, why should I have to pay for an album that isn't even completed yet? And it isn't, otherwise I wouldn't have the option of possibly singing on said album. Why do I get the "honor" of fronting your experiment? Hypothetically speaking, let's say I kick in a certain amount of dollars in to get this show on the road, what guarantee do I have that this album will be worth what I put into it? My main reason for wanting higher album prices is because I want to get what I pay for. I want my $30 album to be worth $30. So what if I pay $10,000 ("Weapons-Grade Plutonium Level" sponsorship, according to her site) to get on the record... and the song sucks. Again assuming that I'm a Sobule fan, what if I don't even like the song I've paid so handsomely to be a part of? I think from that perspective, it takes a little bit of balls to ask for contribution for such a sight unseen project. Here, pay for this, you'll love it. Trust me.

But hey. That's just me.

If you'd like to participate in the creation of Jill Sobule's next record, the cleverly titled "Jill's Next Record," click here. The tally currently stands at $60,000, about $15,000 short of her $75,000 goal.